If you are what you eat, that would explain why so many kids are total boogers.
Funny thoughts on parenting
Why dowant bicycles? Why can’t they just ride around the neighborhood in a stolen Chrysler like I always did?
Parenting tip: HaveDon’t try to teach your kids multi-variable calculus until they’re at least four years old.
I love the pitter-patter of little feet, but only if it’s the sound ofmaking chocolate for me.
Kids’ music should have suggestive lyrics. Stuff like, “Why not go clean your room?” or,so daddy can sleep.”
People who say thereobviously don’t have kids. It’s nighttime that has too few hours.
After I eat, I’d feel a lot better if you would hug me and pat my back until I burp.