Dan's Funny Advice

Juicy Gossip

February 27th, 2013

Dear Dan,

I love to hear a piece of juicy gossip as much as the next girl. However, also like the next girl, I hate when gossip is being spread about me!

I have a family member with whom I feel thinks everything is just news to be passed along to other relatives and friends. I really don’t appreciate the details of my life, whether sordid or boring, being published abroad without my approval.

On the other hand, when this relative has gossip about others I’m all ears.

Yes, Dan of the Day, I’m aware that I am being hypocritical in this matter. I want to hear the latest gossip from this relative without her turning around and gossiping about me. If I say something to her about her gossiping ways she may stop filling me in on the details from the lives of others! So my question for you is: How can I have my cake and eat it too?

Mrs. Somebody
The Den

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Pronouncing a Word Incorrectly

October 17th, 2012

Dear Dan,

I was wondering if it is socially acceptable and how I would go about telling somebody that they are pronouncing a word incorrectly.

Grammar Girl
Greenwood Village

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What to Do With a Whiny Child

July 25th, 2012

Ok Mr. of the Day,

What do you do with a Whiny child?
Help!

Sincerely,
Mama Amahama
Home

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To Cut, or Not to Cut?

June 27th, 2012

Dear Dan,

I’ve been wanting to get my hair cut for quite a while. I know exactly what I want it to look like, and I’m sure that I would like it very much. My problem is two-fold. First, I am petrified of getting a bad haircut. Since I have a very real picture of what I want it to look like, I’m afraid that I will be easily disappointed. Second, I really enjoy being able to style my hair according to my mood. If it was shorter, I would have far fewer options. I’ve noticed that most of my friends do their hair the same way, day after day. While they look lovely much of the time, I don’t think that is something that I would enjoy. To cut, or not to cut?

Haircut-Phobic
Fruitland

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Stop the Bunnies

June 4th, 2012

I need a good solution to keeping random bunnies from eating my garden (that does not involving killing said random bunnies).

Cousin Doe
Kansas

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Reverse the Signs of Aging

February 25th, 2012

Dear Mr. Of the Day,

I am starting to see crow’s feet by my eyes and my skin is becoming blemished and just losing that glow of youth. What products or procedures work best to reverse the signs of aging?

Mrs. Pippenpapzapopolopocus
Omashu City

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Horrible Temper Tantrums

February 4th, 2012

Dear Dan of the Day,
My daughter is throwing horrible temper tantrums all the time. What do I do?
Mother going crazy
Maryland

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Cutting My Husband’s Hair

January 28th, 2012

Dear Dan of the Day,
To save money I cut my husband’s hair at home. This last time I really butchered it. What should I do?

Sally Flowerhaven

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Rastafarian Redneck

January 14th, 2012

Dan,

Today I saw a Rastafarian Redneck with a Dredlocked Mullet. Would that technically be considered a Mullock or a Dredlet?

Sincerely,
Seeneverything
West Virginia

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Husband Likes Me Crazy

September 3rd, 2011

Dear Mr. Of the Day,

My husband just admitted that he likes it when I’m crazy.
What do I do now?

Fanny Eubanks
Omaha

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