Solar flares are funnier if you think of them as star farts.
Modern cowboys are fake. Real cowboys have the chest and head of a boy attached to the body and legs of a cow.
Your secret stash of candy is not as secret as you think. Also, it is now smaller than you think.
Background image deriv. of normanack, https://www.flickr.com/photos/29278394@N00/59538977/
Light a birthday cake on fire, everyone sings. Light garbage on fire, nobody sings. Conclusion: people like garbage more than cake.
Background image by Tela Chhe, https://www.flickr.com/photos/telachhe/2956539243/
Convertible cars are just fancy tents on wheels.
Organic and high in fiber, nutrients and natural bacteria: the new superfood is bull crap.
Why do people tell blatant lies? I know you weren’t at the Super Bowl, because I was, and I didn’t see you there.
There’s no law against disagreeing with people. Or throwing cauliflower at them.
I don’t think Gaston was as unique as LeFou made him out to be.
“Limits are an artificial construct. We are bound only by our imaginations.” Apparently this line will not get you out of speeding tickets.