“To the Victor go the spoils,” I say as I mail my rotten leftovers to some dude named Victor.
Funny thoughts on winning
10.10.2012
The thing about playing tetherball against yourself is you always win but you always lose too.
7.19.2012
My friend said I’m one of the most competitive people he knows. I said, “Who’s the most competitive, and what do I have to do to top them?”
6.21.2012
Whoever said “nobody wins in a shouting match” has never heard how loud I can yell.
7.14.2011
You would buy a mansion if you won the lottery. I would buy a herd of buffalo, shave them, and let them loose downtown. To each his own.