Never shake hands with a zebra. It’s not that they’re mean or diseased, it’s just if they have hands they’re probably evil mutant zebras.
Funny thoughts on wildlife - page 2
1.19.2012
My niece thinks octopuses don’t wear pants because they have too many legs. ‘Course not. It’s because they’d have to open their fly to eat.
10.10.2011
Wolves get a bad rap from fairy tales. Real wolves would never attack anthropomorphic pigs.
7.14.2011
You would buy a mansion if you won the lottery. I would buy a herd of buffalo, shave them, and let them loose downtown. To each his own.
4.12.2010
Why is the emperor penguin so formal? If I were emperor, I’d be like, “T-shirt and jeans for me, but the rest of you have to wear tuxedos.”
12.3.2009
Less known than the common sparrow is the uncommon sparrow, which sports a mohawk and shouts “platypus!” at random.
