Just remember, struggling artists: there are painting elephants who are more successful than you.
Funny thoughts on success
8.21.2014
Define success in your own terms, because you may never have a greater accomplishment than eating that entire can of Cheez Whiz at once.
9.6.2013
Most success requires hard work, but with just some bird food and a loud noise you can get a duck to crap on your neighbor’s porch every day.
9.13.2012
Kids, if your parents don’t like your grades, tell them it takes a couple of Cs to spell success, but not a single A or B.
3.9.2011
If I have accomplished anything in life, it was by standing on the shoulders of giants and whispering into their ears to smash things.
8.30.2010
Could be wrong, but I’m guessing one of the 7 habits of highly effective people is not nose picking.
10.26.2009
The smell of success isn’t sweet; it’s more like stinky B.O., dirt, and stale cheese. Wait, maybe that’s just me.
6.3.2009
If at first you don’t succeed, HA HA!