Dan of the Day » sports

How to Improve Golf

Dan of the Day — Wed, 09 May 2012 19:37:51 +0000

How to improve golf: Air cannons replace drivers. Air pistols for putting. The Black Eyed Peas in place of holes. Golf balls explode.

Dan of the Day — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 21:37:25 +0000

Maria Sharapova has a mean backhand, but so does my wife whenever I try to watch women’s tennis.

Dan of the Day — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 17:07:25 +0000

Something about the way a hotdog and bun are held in the hand always makes me want to throw them like a football.

Dan of the Day — Tue, 11 Jan 2011 19:07:25 +0000

If dodgeball taught me anything, it’s that it’s okay to throw things at other people as long as they’re on the other team.

Dan of the Day — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 17:11:53 +0000

My doctor suggested I play sports for exercise. Man, does bowling get my heart rate going.

Dan of the Day — Thu, 07 Oct 2010 19:23:42 +0000

I’d like to know what percent of tennis shoes are actually used for tennis on a regular basis.

Dan of the Day — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 16:37:46 +0000

Forget the video console in an arena, I think Jumbotron would be a really good name for a Transformer.

Dan of the Day — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 15:59:34 +0000

When people say, “We’re number one!” I always think of it in bathroom terms. Even then, it’s better than being number two.

Dan of the Day — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 14:46:41 +0000

Have you ever committed suicide because your favorite sports team lost? Yeah, me neither.

Dan of the Day — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 19:31:38 +0000

When Carl called the running back’s move a twirl, we knew he was a secret figure skating junkie. That, and he kept calling him Sasha Cohen.