If my name was Joe, I’d go by Sloppy Joe, even though I’m not sloppy. If people asked me why, I’d say, “It’s better than Choppy Joe!” and cut them with my knife.
Funny thoughts on knives
8.19.2011
Extra words can make weapons sound so much cooler:
- knife –> tactical knife
- ax –> battle ax
- spork –> assault spork
7.6.2011
Never bring a knife to a gunfight. Unless you have a gun that shoots knives instead of bullets. Then bring lots of knives.
5.23.2011
I keep these items in my car for legitimate reasons: baseball bat – playing ball, knife – dicing vegetables, axe – lumberjacking, gun – shooting people.
7.2.2010
Doing dishes the other night I noticed we have some Miracle Blade III knives. If they’re such a miracle, why did they redesign them twice?