Why do so many jokes start with an animal walking into a bar? That’s so unrealistic. Everyone knows animals prefer to drink alone.
Funny thoughts on jokes
2.7.2013
The problem with making jokes about lawyers is eventually you get sued for slander and you have to hire a lawyer to defend you.
8.16.2012
Why are comedians expected to be funny all the time? Sometimes I just want to talk about serious things, like nacho vests.
6.11.2012
For someone who lives in Idaho, I definitely don’t write enough jokes about potatoes.
4.20.2012
I was going say the Smashing Pumpkins’ breakup in 2000 ruined my one good Halloween joke, but apparently they’ve reunited and ruined this joke too.
4.11.2012
The secret to a good misdirection joke is to get the audience headed one way and then penguins!
2.3.2012
That awkward moment when someone starts a phrase with, “That awkward moment…”
8.12.2011
Comedy is an art
It’s a talent that comes from the heart
But if you make a gaffe
and you can’t get a laugh
then just make up a joke about farts
8.10.2011
As I understand it, when people make whoopee, that whoopee is then used to make whoopee cushions.
4.16.2010
If someone you know has a serious illness, be sensitive: don’t make jokes. And yes, Can’t Stop Playing GoldenEye is a real disease.