Solar flares are funnier if you think of them as star farts.
Funny thoughts on gas
5.29.2014
Good thing about carpooling: people to punch when you see a slug bug. Bad thing: not supposed to fart whenever you feel like it.
1.25.2013
So, memory foam. Who wants a mattress that remembers everything? “You farted in your sleep last night.” No thanks.
10.12.2011
I think Willy Wonka’s Fizzy Lifting Drink taught us all a valuable lesson: belching is an important skill, and it can save your life.
8.12.2011
Comedy is an art
It’s a talent that comes from the heart
But if you make a gaffe
and you can’t get a laugh
then just make up a joke about farts
8.10.2011
As I understand it, when people make whoopee, that whoopee is then used to make whoopee cushions.
2.10.2010
I know two kinds of people that can be genuinely surprised by their own farts: little babies, and Joan Rivers.
2.1.2010
After I eat, I’d feel a lot better if you would hug me and pat my back until I burp.
8.24.2009
Mankind’s next evolutionary step: less digestive gas.