I probably shouldn’t joke about this, but there’s this guy I see at the gym who wears a t-shirt that says, “Property of Jesus Christ,” and every time I see it, I want to say, “Hey man, maybe you should give Jesus his shirt back.”
Funny thoughts on exercise
6.4.2014
Yoga would be a lot more popular if it didn’t require so much ritual animal sacrifice. Then again, maybe this isn’t a yoga class.
5.16.2013
I can never remember – are you supposed to exorcise your demons, or exercise your demons?
2.21.2013
When you drive past someone who’s jogging, slow down and ask them if they need a ride somewhere.
9.7.2012
Anytime I’m driving to work and don’t feel like going, I look at all the people out jogging and think hey, at least I’m not one of them.
3.7.2012
Hills don’t really exist until I’m on a bicycle.
10.6.2011
Do you remember when running used to be called jogging? People didn’t change what they were doing, but now it sounds faster.
9.14.2011
Whenever I find money in my pocket unexpectedly, I always feel a little guilty for stealing all those people’s clothes from the gym.
11.9.2010
My doctor suggested I play sports for exercise. Man, does bowling get my heart rate going.
