2.22.2012

Sometimes when I’m listening to someone talk I can’t help but think I would like them a lot more if they were a cookie.

Get the Like You As a Cookie t-shirt!

A cookie with the handwritten message underneath: "I'd like you better if you were a cookie."

Dan's Funny Shirts

Slugs Are Just Homeless Snails T-Shirt

Slugs Are Homeless Snails T-Shirt

$16.95 and up
Mullets are hot (because I light them on fire) t-shirt

Mullets Are Hot T-Shirt

$16.95 and up
All shirts...

1.26.2012

I never knew why my high school English teacher didn’t eat the cookies we made. It’s almost as if she knew they were laced with fish medicine that would make her urine green.

9.8.2010

If someone ever gets mad at you for eating their pie, just say, “Can’t we let pie-gones be pie-gones?” Then ask for some cookies.

1.29.2010

“Made from Scratch.” Isn’t that the devil? These are devil cookies!

12.16.2009

One smart cookie? No thanks. I’ll have three smart cookies. Nom, nom, nom.