I thought Justin Beaver was a character from Dora the Explorer. Now you’re telling me he fathered a child?
Funny thoughts on celebrities
6.8.2011
If someone says they’re a big fan of yours, ask to see the tattoo.
3.2.2011
Despite the faked death and multiple plastic surgeries, I know Thriller was true: Michael Jackson has been a zombie since 1983.
2.10.2010
I know two kinds of people that can be genuinely surprised by their own farts: little babies, and Joan Rivers.
