A diamond ring is a hard, cold, lifeless symbol for a new marriage. We should have engagement kittens.
Funny thoughts on cats
1.31.2012
You would think that by now everyone would’ve seen enough roadkill to know that cat-like reflexes aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.
2.24.2011
There are certain things you should never set on the stove, even if you think it’s not hot. Officially adding cats to that list.
1.27.2011
It was raining cats and dogs, so I called animal control. Turns out a tornado hit the local pound.
9.21.2010
You wouldn’t have to worry about letting the cat out of the bag if you hadn’t put it in there in the first place.
7.14.2010
For some reason, the Be-good-or-we’ll-sell-you-to-the-Gypsies threat works on the kids, but not the cat. Maybe he knows Gypsies don’t buy cats.
7.1.2010
The problem with breeding mutant mice is it only takes one mutant cat to undo years of work.
8.14.2009
I keep accidentally eating my pets. Maybe I should get something less appetizing, like a cat instead of a Twinkie.
7.15.2009
Manicures are for men, womanicures are for women, pedicures are for dogs and cats. No idea what epicures are good for.