Geese draw the letter V like a drunk kindergartner.
Funny thoughts on alcohol
5.1.2013
Why do so many jokes start with an animal walking into a bar? That’s so unrealistic. Everyone knows animals prefer to drink alone.
11.5.2012
Spring forward, fall back. Unless you’re drunk, in which case you don’t spring at all and you fall forward.
8.13.2012
I got a guy fired today for drinking on the job. Wait until after work to drink that water, buddy.
12.21.2011
“Take baby steps.” Oh, so stumble forward like a drunk and fall on my face? Thanks for the advice.
11.2.2011
Fall isn’t a very good name for autumn. Things are falling all year: rain, snow, my 401K, drunk people. Maybe St. Patrick’s day should be called fall.
3.3.2011
Saw a guy with a shirt that said, “In dog beers, I’ve only had one.” I’m thinking that’s maybe 0.3 human beers, so…
9.10.2009
I saw a sign that said, “Drink and drive, go to jail,” but I don’t take orders from signs.