When people say, “Becoming an adult is the worst decision I ever made,” I agree. It would have been better if they had died.
Dan of the Day Archive - 7/2014
7.23.2014
Dirigible plums should float away when you throw them at someone’s face, right? Because maybe those were regular plums.
7.22.2014
Grammar tip – There’s a difference between lay and lie: You lay a book down. You lie if you’re a politician.
7.18.2014
TV is so fake. There is no way Homer Simpson is that dumb in real life.
7.17.2014
If Captain Obvious were a real superhero, you’ve gotta know he would say, “I’m Captain Obvious!” at least 50 times a day.
7.16.2014
Even more difficult than deep-sea diving or skydiving is earth diving. Mostly you lie on the ground and see how low you can go.
7.15.2014
Technically speaking, the song should say, “From where did you come, Cotton Eye Joe?”
7.11.2014
New food idea: peas on the cob. Still working out the details.
7.10.2014
Why can’t people just accept me for who I am: a normal, everyday guy with an arm growing out of my forehead?
7.9.2014
I’m still trying to find Sam Hill. I need to figure out what in Sam Hill is going on in my life.
