Is it wrong of me to purposely flush a toilet every time I hear someone talking on their phone in a public restroom?
Dan of the Day Archive - 7/2012
7.30.2012
It isn’t fair that the UK gets to host the Olympics. Didn’t they just have the Quidditch World Cup?
7.27.2012
Actually, the lessons of the Tortoise and the Hare are 1) reptiles are bald, and 2) people always misspell the word “hair.”
7.26.2012
For some reason dropping pianos on people is a lot funnier in cartoons than in real life.
What to Do With a Whiny Child
July 25th, 2012Ok Mr. of the Day,
What do you do with a Whiny child?
Help!Sincerely,
Mama Amahama
Home
7.24.2012
I’m feeling weird about that cat food I just ate. Is it made from real cats, or is that just a name?
7.23.2012
Bears are just as scared of you as you are of them, except they have twice your mass, razor-sharp claws and jaws that can crush steel.
7.20.2012
It’s ridiculous that twice a year I pay good money to try to take a nap while someone scrapes my teeth and gums with sharp metal objects.
7.19.2012
My friend said I’m one of the most competitive people he knows. I said, “Who’s the most competitive, and what do I have to do to top them?”
7.18.2012
Follow your dreams, they say, but I have no idea how to play golf in outer space with Teddy Roosevelt and a purple chicken.