Whoever said,was probably not a woman.
Dan of the Day Archive - 7/2011 - page 2
“Just because you’re not paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you.”
There have been a lot of innovative toilet plungers, but the old rubber cup model is still the best for
You would buy a mansionthe lottery. I would buy a herd of buffalo, shave them, and let them loose downtown. To each his own.
What you call “lazy,” I call “conservation of energy.” I’m saving the earth by
People talk about getting away with murder, but what about getting away with dropping thousands ofon the White House from a plane? Why isn’t that a phrase?
Thank you for sharing your subwoofer’s bass with me. In return, I will be glad to sharewith you.
“I don’t think anyone should write their autobiography until after they’re dead.”
I go through periods of time where I want tountil I can’t move. I call these periods “days.”
If you’re ever beingdon’t climb a tree. Bears eat trees whole, so you might be swallowed accidentally.