Dan of the Day Archive - 11/2010

I dyed myself purple and stayed in the bathtub all week. My life-long dream of being one of the California Raisins is finally coming true!

I created a martial art that mixes Ninjutsu, Kendo, Kung Fu, Jiu-Jitsu, Nihontodo, and Sanchin-Ryu. I call it Nintendo Fujitsu Nissan.

I’m sick and tired of having everything in my home emptied into a garbage truck every week! Maybe I should move out of this dumpster.

So relieved to find out the “black ops” people have been talking to me about is just a video game. I was worried my cover had been blown.

I never understood that “She’s Always a Woman to Me” song. It’s like Billy Joel was dating a man but was in denial.