Halloween: The kids are scared of ghosts and monsters. The adults are scared people will think they’re pedophiles if they don’t give out candy.
Dan of the Day Archive - 10/2010
10.28.2010
When that woman rides by on her bike I swear I can hear someone playing the theme for the Wicked Witch from Oz.
10.27.2010
They say lip balm is addictive, but I have ingested, snorted and smoked the stuff with nary a craving.
10.26.2010
Fruit with brains? If it’s true, then yes, grape minds think alike.
10.22.2010
I don’t have any scruples, but you’re welcome to the Doritos in the pantry.
10.21.2010
Lids on laundry hampers have two evil goals: 1) inconvenience those who put clothes in, and 2) keep the clothes from escaping.
10.20.2010
If you’re ever surrounded by a pack of wild dogs, just pretend you have fleas so they’ll feel bad for you. Then shoot them with your gun.
10.19.2010
If eyes are the window to the soul, then you shouldn’t open them because what if flies come in?
10.18.2010
You know what you can never find when you need one? Leprechauns. Where are those little guys?
10.15.2010
I can’t blame politicians who are flip-floppers. Who can resist comfortable footwear?