Why do flies suddenly appear every time you are near? Unlike me, they long to be close to you.
June, 2010
6.29.2010
Hope for humanity? I lost mine the day I saw a grown man pick his nose and eat it.
6.28.2010
I’m glad I don’t have a light bulb over my head, because I would have gotten in trouble every time I was told, “Now, don’t get any ideas.”
6.25.2010
Sometimes it is so hard to not look both ways when crossing a one-way street.
6.24.2010
Objects in motion tend to be my children. Or was it the other way around? Hold still so I can think straight!
6.22.2010
The nice thing about virgin olive oil is you know it’s not going to reproduce.
6.21.2010
I hate Monday. We should get rid of it. And replace it with another Tuesday.
6.18.2010
In his first blunder as a supervillian, Dr Croc mistakenly referred to his cretins as “croutons.”
6.17.2010
If you don’t like someone, wait until they are wearing purple, then stomp on them and say, “I thought you were a grape!”
