Jargon: an industry’s way of making you think that what they do is really complicated.

Here’s a partial list of some corporate jargon:

• SBU – strategic business underwear
• actionable – movies like the Terminator, Batman, the Matrix, etc.
• conflict resolution – resolving issues through armed force
• best practices – the kind that end with a shout of, “Goooo team!” followed by milk and cookies
• CEO – chief executioner officer
• competitive advantage – performance-enhancing substances
• milestones – large stones carried for a mile as a business-related punishment
• MNC – multi-nautilus company
• downsize – what to do when you have no idea how to fix things
• rightsize – the same as downsize (!)
• monetization – selling off office furniture, appliances, etc.

Know some jargon of your own?